new blog

I started a new blog on wordpress, follow me at notmuchofadutch.wordpress.com and if you want to read about our family adventures, follow us at lovelaceescape.wordpress.com! Happy Blogging ya'll:)

Who do you see?

I am certain that one of the greatest strongholds that Satan has in the lives of women today is in regards to our perception. More specifically, our perception of ourselves. Many times when we look in the mirror, we are blind to what is actually staring back at us. It's almost as if we look into a mirror that has been distorted.

Instead of seeing our kindness through our smile, we see teeth that could be more straight...whiter.

Instead of seeing hair that the Bible talks about being a woman's glory, we notice the split ends and roots.

Instead of seeing our integrity through our eyes, we see the bags and black circles.

Instead of seeing our hands that have the ability to give and give generously, we see unfinished nails and dry skin.

Instead of patting our stomach and being thankful for food to eat, we pull at it in utter disgust.

Instead of standing in confidence, we slouch in discontent.

And instead of believing who God, our creator, tells us we are....we believe the lies Satan tells us.

Did you know that before Satan fell from heaven, he was known as one of the most beautiful angels of all? Ironic how we struggle with that today, huh? Because if we truly knew how beautiful we were....think of how Satan would feel. And we wouldn't want him to feel bad would we?! (enter sarcasm)

We have got in to the vicious cycle of comparing, competing and complacency. We are literally self-destructing and allowing Satan to take away who we truly are. Don't be defeated. Don't give up and don't give in. FIGHT. The bible says that our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. We are held responsible, not only for what we physically put into our bodies, but also for what we emotionally and spiritually do to our bodies.

The first step is realizing the stronghold that Satan has in our lives when it comes to who we are believing ourselves to be. For some of us, he has got a hold on our perception. Some have said that the eyes are the windows of the soul....

I have to be completely honest and say that this blog and the words that are flowing from my fingertips and speaking to a struggle that I have and have had. I realize that it is a daily struggle for me....to accept who God says I am and to take my perception and put it back in the hands of the one who created it in the first place. It's kind of like putting on spiritual contacts. Every morning when I wake up, everything is distorted and blurry until I put my contacts in and I see things for what they truly are. Its interesting how everything changes when my contacts go in. Without them, my face is scrunched up and I am constantly glaring because I can't truly see...I looked upset and frustrated (which eventually I become). Then, when my contacts go in, my face literally changes, along with my attitude and perception. I am finding out that the same is true when we choose to put on our "spiritual contacts" and allow God to change our perception.

I realize that if I do not choose to make an effort and change my perception of myself and learn to be happy with who God created me to be, then not only am I miserable and not living life the way God intended me to live, but I am also setting an example for the young women God has entrusted me with. I have this rule that I give my cheerleaders on the first day of practice each year and its "You can not say anything negative about yourself or others" and if they do...20 push-ups! I don't do in hopes to punish them, but I do it so that they would hopefully notice how what they say about themselves affects what they believe about themselves. The first two weeks of practice, there is always a lot of push-ups going on, but eventually the girls catch themselves and they realize how often they are negative about their image and they slowly begin to change. If only they could see how beautiful they truly are, inside and out. If only we could see how beautiful we are. Beautiful. Created with a purpose and passion in the image of God himself.

I am reminding myself this morning that:

I am born of God, and the evil one cannot harm me. (1 John 5:18)

I am confident that the good work that God has begun in me will be perfected. (Philippians 1:6)

I am free from any condemning charges against me. (Romans 8:31)

I can find grace and mercy in time of need. (Hebrews 4:16)

I am hidden with Christ in God. (Colossians 3:3)

I have not been given a spirit of fear but of power, love and a sound mind. (2 Timothy 1:7)

I cannot be separated from the love of God. (Romans 8:35)

I am a citizen of heaven. (Philippians 3:20)

I am free forever from condemnation. (Romans 8:1-2)

I have been established, anointed and sealed by God. (2 Corinthians 1:21-22)

How do people do this without Him?

2009 already?! Sometimes I wish I was still that innocent, sheltered young girl in High School who only had to worry about finishing my homework, deciding what to wear, and going to practice. I realize now, how much I was unaware of the things going on in the world around me.

2009. I'm 23 years old and feel the weight of the world on my shoulders. It's not that I feel I have so much responsibility or work load, but I feel the weight of peoples pain and suffering that I was once ignorant too. For a girl who declares at the top of her lungs that I am not one of those highly emontional girly girls, I have come to find out that my heart fights that phrase. I often ask God to break my heart for what breaks his. In doing so, I know in the depths of my mind that God is capable of doing so and that I am ready for it, but in the fore-front...I am caught off guard everytime.

2009. Its only been 4 weeks in to the new year and already my world has been flipped, turned, stopped and thrown in every direction. My emotions have been on a non-stop rollercoaster ride, which no matter how loud I scream and wave my arms to signal to God knows who to let me off, has yet to stop. In all of this, I have come to realize the following revelation:

LIFE IS MESSY. LIFE IS HARD. LIFE IS NECESSARY.

And in coming to the new found revelation of mine, I can't help but wonder, how in the world people can go through life without Jesus. Jesus has truly been my saving grace these past few weeks (not to mention my whole life!). When situation after situation shook me up, all I knew to do was to get on my face before God and cry out to him. Life is seeming to get harder and harder as I get older and I am realizing that choosing LIFE is necessary. Choosing to run to God and face plant at his feet and allowing him to restore whats been broken is so vital.

In these past few weeks, I can literally feel and see the Devil in certain situations. I see the strongholds and addictions he has on people and many of them are beginning to surface their ugly head. It says in John that "the enemy comes to kill, steal and destroy". The Bible is truth and that part of scripture is not to be taken lightly, but seldom we forget that although that is satans purpose for our life, we serve a God who overcame death, hell and the grave and will take what we sometimes give into and turn it around for his glory.

I am so sick and fed up with the Devil killing peoples dreams, stealing peoples passions and destroying families.

Have you ever had a moment in your life where you were doing something that was almost like an outer body experience? I recently had one of those this past thursday. I had shown up to work only to soon find out that somebodys unchecked sin reared its ugly head and a whole church soon found itself in the midst of a tradegy. (enter rollercoaster of emotions). It was almost as if my heart exploded and the rest of my body was under full control of it. I drove straight to my church, plugged my headphones in and cranked up hillsong united you'll come. I opened my bible and began to scream at the devil a chapter from the book of Psalms (which I am sure is why it was written in the first place ;)). Psalms 136 is one of the most repetitive scriptures in the bible, but in that moment, it was as if I could not say it enough. Psalms 136 goes back in forth from reminding God's people of what he had conquered and overcame for us to repeatedly announcing His love endures forever! And as I trucked back and forth through the aisles of the sancturary, I screamed this chapter to the devil. The devil can only do to us what we foolishly allow him to do, but no matter what....GODS LOVE ENDURES FOREVER. No matter what stronghold we cant seem to shake loose, no matter how deep and dark the pit is that we seem to continually fall into and no matter how hopeless our addiction seems to be....GOD'S LOVE ENDURES FOREVER. period.

It's time to get fed up. Get physically, emotionally, spiritually fed up. Stop being ignorant to what satan is doing and stand up and do something about it. Start re-claiming the promises God has for you. Start claiming your family, your marriage, your kids, your pastors, your friends, your relationships, your health, your finances, your life...in Jesus name. The name that is above all names. Jesus, who conquered death, hell and the grave. He came to give us life and life to the fullest. The King of Kings who never said that Life would be easy, but in all circumanstances, to choose life. CHOOSE LIFE. Stop allowing Satan to kill your dreams, steal your passion and destroy your family. Stop allowing Satan to kill your hopes, steal your joy and destroy your future. Stop allowing Satan to kill your _____________, steal your ____________ and destroy your _______________________! The only power he has is the power you give him. Stand up and fight! And if I have learned anything in these past weeks as I feel stranded in the valley, its that the only way up is down. Get on your knees. Indent your face on the floor. Fight. Life is messy and hard, but it's necessary!

God's go-to person.

“Lord, help us to understand the depth of Your ever sovereign sacrifice in Jesus. That what the Law could not do, weak as it was through the flesh, God did: sending His own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and as an offering for sin, He condemned sin in the flesh…” (Rom 8:3)

I have just been having one of those encounters with God lately, where I just feel him. I crave to just sit in silence with anticipation that He would speak to me. Me?! The creator of the universe speaks to me?! The very thought is so hard to comprehend. I go through these phases where I feel it is so hard to press into God and I'm so impatient with waiting for him to do something, anything, in my life and the whole time I don't even realize that it's becuase I am so focused on wanting God to do something for me instead of just wanting God. I don't even take the time to see that I'm giving no effort into my relationship with him.

Then, there are other times, where you spontaneously open your bible (to be honest, sometimes just out of boredom) and God just meets you there. He shows up and the words on the pages cut to my heart and make my circumstances endurable (is that even a word? It works in my head...).

Someone recently asked me what my biggest fear was and other than the typical girl answers, as well as, some dishonest boys, I couldnt place my finger on the heart of the matter. A few days have passed since that question and it dawned on me that my biggest fear, in the depths of my heart, is that God would pass me by. Not because of the forgiveness that I sometimes find hard to accept or the grace that I find so hard to recieve, but because of missed opportunities or failures to launch. A professor in college once told me that if you earnestly ask God to give you an opportunity each day to do something for his kingdom, that he would. Maybe He would give you a conversation with someone who was hurting, looking for hope or maybe it would be eyes to see past what everybody else sees and into the heart of someone searching for answers. The opportunities are endless and, at the same time, are in desperate need of someone to be willing to take.

I want to always be willing. I want to always have my hand held high before God even asks the question, "Who will go?" I want to walk without fear, pray without ceasing, love without limits, give without hesitation. I want to be God's go-to person.

This blog writing has been so interesting for me to have started becuase I have been able to see the process God is taking me through. I tend to go through valleys with God, sometimes your up and sometimes your down, but I'm still going through. The greatest thing about the valley is that when you are at top you can see for miles and each hill you climb is worth it because of what you see when you reach the top!

mmmhmmm..... God is good!

God's grace is amazing...how lucky are we!

Count yourself lucky, how happy you must be-
you get a fresh start,
your slate's wiped clean.

Count yourself lucky-
God holds nothing against you
and you're holding nothing back from him.

When I kept it all inside,
my bones turned to powder,
my words became daylong groans.

The pressure never let up;
all the juices of my life dried up.

Then I let it all out;
I said, "I'll make a clean breast of my failures to God."

Suddenly the pressure was gone-
my guilt dissolved,
my sin disappeared.

(Psalm 32:1-20ish the message version)

Don't ever let Satan take away what Christ did on the cross for you. Don't ever let him steal your joy, your purpose and your forgiveness. When you make the choice to lay your guilt, fear, sin, shame, etc. at the foot of the cross, don't let satan steal that moment from you. Instead, go to the cross with confidence. Let the tears of Jesus mix with yours as you humbly kneel at his feet. There is no greater feeling than the release of sin into the arms of the one whom died to take it for you. God's grace is amazing and everyday I am reminded how i dont deserve it but that its freely given.

Sorry Erin! Its been over a month since my last post, needless to say my life has been hectic, interesting and ever changing! Along with the busyness of my jobs, I am now fighting a sickness in my body, so if anyone out there is praying for me, please keep me in your prayers! This time of the year is the busiest for me, so being sick is not a good thing!

To give a quick update on my life over the past month, the LHS football team did better than expected and are advancing to the quater finals this saturday, which means I get to coach both the basketball squad and the football squad at the same time. This past saturday, my girls attended CheerFest and I was so proud of them!

They did so good and i am so glad that I coach at Lynden ;).

Lets see....what else is new....Our church had a very successful Trunk or Treat Event with over 1500 Trunk of Treaters and we gave away over 3300 pounds of candy! It was soooo much fun!

I was cupid...The kids had a costume drawing contest where they got to compete to create my costume...hints the cupid....believe me...it could have been worse!

Lastly, the newest thing to be added to my life, is that I am temporarly teaching Pre-school with my mom. It's about a 4 month job, takes lots of energy and PATIENCE, but the kids are too much fun! The job has defiently confirmed to me that I can not sing, perform multi-task reading (such as using a flannel graph while trying to remember the story) and that I enjoy hanging out with kids more than I thought!

I think that's it for now...

Mmm...I love fall!

As much as I love summer, sun, the beach, pool, etc....I really do love fall! The leaves change colors and fall on the street...and in our town there is a main street that leads into the heart of our town and on each side of the road for over a mile has these big trees lining the road. Picture perfect...plus it's football season :).

After my wonderful, relaxing day at the coffee shop, I came home to work out but got distracted by the Nestle Tollhouse cookbook! Which led to my mom and I baking this amazing chocolate chip, peanut butter pie...so much fun! Now it's a waiting game....haha.